Breaking Dawn Review
I would like to start off by saying I am not a fan, I just watched the movies to keep up with current events and still have relevant input in teenage banter (Dont look at me like that).
It starts off with the wedding of “Mr. I have made vampires everywhere seem like pale weenies in the mind of every teenage girl on the planet” and a droopy Bella that almost looks like her character has been on a 30 day binge doing pure Colombian joy powder off a transgenic prostitute’s ass crack with her bridal party, even the nuptials were dated and boring, not even Dave Tutera could have saved this wedding (Don’t ask me why I know that name).
The movie quickly moves to the honeymoon on some Island by Rio (you know like the bird movie where they dance) and then the most passionless love scene accompanied by crap music, I mean its more interesting to watch two flies f#$% on the discovery channel.
Then we see the fastest pregnancy in history followed by a graphic and gruesome c-section (hopefully this will push those pre-pubescent girl fans to abstinence until the next craze)
The only action you see is at the end with a battle that looks like a broadway dance number more than a fight and it culminates with werewolf guy AKA shark boy lmao, having to pick between his pack or to keep stalking the mouth breather (though choice huh).
Spoiler alert:
you can also see Edward googleing demon child which was funny, the werewolf is really in love with bella’s baby not her, its some weirdness from the book that I have yet to comprehend, anyway stay away from this movie it seems that they decided to split it up into two movies like the potter series but the only thing that came out was a cliched self parody of a movie that will probably keep its numbers because of the huge following, even though the writing is crap not that the one from the first movie deserved an academy award but geez.
so avoid, avoid, avoid if you can.
Breaking Dawn Movie Poster
Breaking Dawn Love Scene
Better Love Scene for Breaking Dawn
Tags: Bella, Breaking Dawn, Edward, Jacob, Movie Review, Taylor Lautner, Twilight Saga
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